New Orleans Saints, Sorry For Your Loss!
Not too long ago, the NFLPA lobbied to remove a preseason game so that it could help prevent the wear and tear of the players’ bodies. That seemed to be …
Read MoreAuthor: Mike Maxwell
New York Jets, Sorry For Your Loss!
Seventeen weeks ago, there was a buzz, nay, a push to the NFL world to say the New York Jets have righted the ship and will be back on the …
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New England Patriots, Sorry For Your Loss!
We are so close to the end of the NFL season. Now is the time that families get to see their loved ones return from bitter fantasy football playoff defeat, …
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Baltimore Ravens, Sorry For Your Loss!
It is truly the most wonderful time of the NFL year. I can say that as I’ve only had to hear Mariah Carey twice this month (#Blessed). This time of …
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Tennessee Titans, Sorry For Your Loss!
Ah, the holiday season. It’s that special time of year, when we take stock of the year, count our blessings, and realize that sadly, we missed the fantasy football playoffs …
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Los Angeles Rams, Sorry For Your Loss!
What a great time to be alive… in the hunt for the NFL playoffs. Right now, there’s so much traffic of mediocre teams vying to get into the mix for …
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Minnesota Vikings, Sorry For Your Loss!
One of the most enjoyable things about the NFL season is watching the weekly rollercoaster. Just a short while ago, the talking heads were finally agreeing that there is a …
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Los Angeles Chargers, Sorry For Your Loss!
Week nine for the NFL gave us some great matchups. Some of which were circled long ago when the schedule came out. Once again, a California dream was to see …
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Arizona Cardinals, Sorry For Your Loss!
We are officially at the midway point of the NFL season, and the list of contenders has some new names. It’s been a great surprise this year to not look …
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Pittsburgh Steelers, Sorry For Your Loss!
We’ve flipped the calendar from the early season to November, which is when we get the cold chill of reality on the NFL season. Mathematically, all teams are contenders under …
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Tampa Bay Buccaneers, Sorry For Your Loss!
2022, the year the NFL reminded its legacy quarterbacks that retirement is inevitable. We are approaching the halfway point in the season and suddenly the layup prediction that is the …
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Green Bay Packers, Sorry For Your Loss!
It took forty years but look at the NFL season now! Both the Jets and Giants have winning records after a month of gameplay. Week six was quite a tale …
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Denver Broncos, Sorry For Your Loss!
Through five weeks of the NFL season, the AFC has not let us down when it comes to scheduling high-profile primetime matchups, as we saw on Monday Night Football when …
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Carolina Panthers, Sorry For Your Loss!
There is a short list of NFL coaches who are already secretly updating their résumés, hoping to find their next life as a panelist on morning pregame shows. One of …
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Las Vegas Raiders, Sorry For Your Loss!
Through three weeks, the NFL season is doing a great job of delivering weekly gut punches. Week three brought us Raiders versus Titans, an AFC matchup of bruised head coach …
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Indianapolis Colts, Sorry For Your Loss!
hat a week the NFL brought us! Is it possible to have a statement game in week two of the season?! Because if so, the Jaguars and Colts both made …
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Dallas Cowboys, Sorry For Your Loss!
Cue It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year. The new NFL season is upon us, and so much hope and intrigue filled the games in week one. The NFL …
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Philadelphia Eagles, Sorry For Your Loss!
Finally, we had an 18th week of the NFL regular season. Much like the final two slices of eating a frozen pizza on my own, it was probably not necessary. …
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Kansas City Chiefs, Sorry For Your Loss!
We’ve made it to your grandpa’s finale to the NFL’s regular season! The NFL has chosen to add a regular-season game and take away a preseason game for the sake …
Read More Los Angeles Chargers, Sorry For Your Loss!
We are so close! The NFL regular season is coming to an end and those with the hope of a playoff berth are fighting for their lives. The AFC West …
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Jacksonville Jaguars, Sorry For Your Loss!
Well, on the fifteenth week of the NFL season, the CDC gave to me, a wave of players out with COVID-19. Take comfort in the fact I didn’t bother with …
Read More Baltimore Ravens, Sorry For Your Loss!
With the NFL season quickly approaching the regular season finale, week fourteen set some teams up with a great opportunity to close the door on their rivals. We typically talk …
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New Orleans Saints, Sorry For Your Loss!
As usual, the first week of December football brings a cold dose of reality to fledgling teams. There’s only so much time left to climb up the standings for a …
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Pittsburgh Steelers, Sorry For Your Loss!
The holiday season is upon us. Sure, that may warm your heart but for me, the approaching playoff run is equally as exciting. There was a team in particular that …
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New York Giants, Sorry For Your Loss!
Eleven weeks ago, we all had an idea of how the NFL season was going to go. The scheduling committee celebrated Tom Brady’s latest championship ring by handing him a …
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Los Angeles Rams, Sorry For Your Loss!
Boy oh boy, The 49ers made themselves quite the splash in Week Ten. Monday Night Football had themselves a spicy NFC West divisional game on the docket when they made …
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San Francisco 49ers, Sorry For Your Loss!
The ninth week of our fine NFL season dropped some real knowledge on us fans and even coaches. As we cross into the second half of the season, there’s no …
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Chicago Bears, Sorry For Your Loss!
The past week of the NFL games was not a gut punch to those hopeless dreamers. It was the heart-ripping “FINISH HIM” moment of my Mortal Kombat filled youth. In …
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Denver Broncos, Sorry For Your Loss!
If you blinked, then you might have just missed the first quarter of the NFL 2021 season. Sure, we have 17 games now but let me be loose with my …
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Indianapolis Colts, Sorry For Your Loss!
Week three of the NFL season finished with some key wins that helped shape a lot of key races in the league. The NFL treated us to an AFC South …
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New York Jets, Sorry For Your Loss!
NFL’s week two was full of some very tight matchups. We aren’t yet at the point where team identities are fully developed, so there are opportunities for surprises, upsets, or …
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Atlanta Falcons, Sorry For Your Loss!
Welcome back, NFL! The start of the season is filled with more unbridled hope and unwarranted faith than a blind date. Last season we witnessed Tom Brady pull the baton …
Read More San Francisco 49ers, Sorry For Your Loss: San Francisco DNRs
The NFL did it! We have finished the regular season amid a global pandemic. Week 17 literally is the end of the road for many of the teams but why …
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Indianapolis Colts, Sorry For Your Loss: Colt 86ed
It’s that time of year again! Columnists get to use their triple word score of penultimate for their columns! We have navigated the 2020 NFL season and we’re close to …
Read More Pittsburgh Steelers, Sorry For Your Loss: Throwing in the Terrible Towel
Week 15 of the NFL season was a splendid punch in the gut for some teams, and some of these playoff hopefuls are not getting back up. The 2020 playoff …
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New Orleans Saints, Sorry For Your Loss: Time to Geaux
Week fourteen was very telling, separating the haves from the have-nots. I say this mainly as someone on the fringe making the fantasy football playoffs. In actual NFL gameplay, week …
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Seattle Seahawks, Sorry For Your Loss: Your ‘Hawk is Cooked
Luckily, the NFL wrapped up its week thirteen, and we again saw some major hits to playoff hopes. The second half of the season is showing a transition where some …
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Arizona Cardinals, Sorry For Your Loss: Falling off the Kliff
On the twelfth week of the season, the NFL gave me, a clear understanding they don’t have a COVID protocol. Ok, that really doesn’t fit the rhyme pattern I wanted. …
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Las Vegas Raiders, Sorry For Your Loss: Grieving Las Vegas
We have nearly finished the third month of the NFL season. It’s clearer than ever that 2020 is up for grabs. No one is unstoppable, and before you yell ‘Steelers’ …
Read More Denver Broncos, Sorry For Your Loss: Locked out of the Postseason
The tenth week of the NFL season is toast and down goes another hopeful team. COVID-19 robbed us of the most pointless thing this year, the NFL preseason. We missed …
Read More Chicago Bears, Sorry For Your Loss: It’s Hibernation Season
Week nine of the NFL season was another exciting run of games. As the playoff picture begins to really show itself, this is the time of year where realistic GMs …
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Carolina Panthers, Sorry For Your Loss: Carolina Reapered
Week 8 is in the books for us NFL fans and as the dust settles we start to see our interest in draft prospects rise. Sure, there’s buzz that the …
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Dallas Cowboys, Sorry For Your Loss: Requiem For A(merica’s) Team
Look at you NFL! You finished week seven in a season we didn’t think would finish, and suddenly we’re halfway through the year. This week of the season came into …
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Minnesota Vikings, Sorry For Your Loss: Skol’s Out
Week six of the NFL season is in the books! That sound was not the rustling of falling leaves, but the dying hopes and dreams for some preseason darlings. The …
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Cincinnati Bengals, Sorry For Your Loss: Joe, Buried
NFL week five ended with its first Tuesday Night Football game since 2010. The contenders are starting to put their footprint into this young and delicate season. Sure the AFC …
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Houston Texans, Sorry For Your Loss: The End of an Era
The first quarter of the 2020 NFL season is in the books and we lost only one game to COVID?! Winner winner! Week four provided some great signs of life …
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Atlanta Falcons, Sorry For Your Loss: (Really) Dirty South
The third week of the NFL season was just what the doctor ordered. It was an exciting week of action, with many close games going down to the wire. There …
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New York Giants, Sorry For Your Loss: Lost Season State of Mind
Week 2 in the NFL was a rough one. Whether you’re a fantasy football player or just a good old fashioned fan, it was tough to watch. So many players …
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Detroit Lions, Sorry For Your Loss
The 2020 NFL season is here. And at this point, anything short of getting the final Game of Thrones book would make this 2020’s saving grace. COVID-19 has leapfrogged over any …
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Free Agency Primer: Quarterbacks
The confetti is all but swept away from this past Sunday’s Super Bowl. Congratulations to the Chiefs and their fans! Unfortunately, the rest of the league and their fans are …
Read More Minnesota Vikings SFYL: Your Season is Over Dontcha-know?!
I know what you’re thinking, why is there a week seventeen Sorry for Your Loss when the regular season is over? Well, even though there are twelve teams in the …
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Sorry for Your Loss, Seattle Seahawks: Definitely Not Seattle’s Finest
There’s only one full week left in the 2019 NFL season and it has been a memorable one, to say the least. December sorted out the remaining pretenders from contenders …
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Sorry for Your Loss, Los Angeles Rams: Another Sad L.A. Story
The tension of the NFL regular season really is coming to a close. Week 15 had some beautiful knockout punches to the postseason hopes of some high profile franchises for …
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Dallas Cowboys, Sorry For Your Loss: Not All Dak
The NFL calendar says we just finished week fourteen, but this really feels like Christmas to me. I am a deflated Chicago Bears fan and well, we have nothing to …
Read More Sorry For Your Loss, Week 13: Shut it Down and Pack it up, Oakland Raiders!
NFL week thirteen closed with the thud of a few more nails in the coffins of some teams’ title hopes. Sure there’s some math that says your team has a …
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Sorry For Your Loss, Jacksonville Jaguars: Drain the Swamp, Minshtache and All!
This is the point in the season where we start to really enjoy the downfall of the hopeful. As a Bears fan with a brain, I knew we’d crap the …
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SFYL 11: Philly (Not So) Special
Eleven weeks into the NFL season and we’re really starting to break some hearts and shatter some dreams. This column started the year very AFC heavy, and justifiably so as …
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SFYL Week 10: Don’t Look This Sad Gift Horse in the Mouth, Indianapolis Colts
The tenth week of the NFL season didn’t disappoint. That is, unless you ran my fantasy team or picked the Saints in a cakewalk against the Falcons. Woof! There were …
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Sorry For Your Loss Week 9: Beware of the Trap Game!
Week nine in the NFL was a pretty compelling one for us. It’s debatable but the NFC seems to be the stronger and more competitive of the conferences this year. …
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Kenny Gobble-Day: More Thanksgiving Fantasy Football Team Names
(The 2019 Thanksgiving Fantasy Football Team Names list was also co-authored by Evan Hoovler, Jeff Krisko, and Bryan Sclar) There has been a huge demand for our Halloween-themed fantasy football …
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Sorry For Your Loss Week 9: What the Buc?!
The Bucs’ Season Is Over Look at you NFL, halfway done with your season and what do you have to show for it? Two undefeated teams, a slew of quarterback …
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Bear Down, and Stay Down For a Very Long Time
Week 7 in the NFL caught a little bit of the college homecoming vibe in Chicago when Sean Payton brought his physically bruised Saints team to the emotionally bruised Chicago …
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Sorry For Your Loss: The Hype Train Derails in Brown Town
Can the Browns Make the Playoffs? As I write this week’s post in the middle of America, the air turns crisp and the leaves are beginning to change colors. Don’t …
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SFYL Week 5: Well, At Least We Have a Kicker!
Will the Pittsburgh Steelers Be in the Playoffs? Week 5 of the NFL was full of many statements and a couple upsets. The storm of chaos in the AFC is …
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2019 Fantasy Football Team Names: TV Edition!
(Co-Authors: Waleed Ismail, Mike Maxwell, Bryan Sclar, and Jason Lu) Time for our weekly dose of fantasy football team names. These week 5-centered team names are all taken from the …
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It Can’t Go Any Further South: Can the Falcons Make the Playoffs?
Week four is in the books and we are beginning to see who came to play in 2019. This weekend’s slate of games had some great highlights but nothing caught …
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Sorry For Your Loss: A Tiger Doesn’t Change It’s Stripes
Will the Bengals make the playoffs? If you’re looking for a definitive answer, we’ve got it. If you’re optimistic, you came to the wrong place.
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Will the Jets Make the Playoffs? Sorry for Your Loss Week 2 (J. E. T. S. … LOST LOST LOST!)
The leaves haven’t even changed colors yet but late Monday night, the NY Jet fan base went from ‘WE GOT Le’VEON!’ to ‘WE GOT GASED!’ I am sorry for your …
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Sorry For Your Loss: Week 1 Lo Siento Mi-ami
Are the Miami Dolphins Tanking? Welcome back to the NFL! 100 seasons and still ticking! I am excited to be here in all perspective, a young columnist (I haven’t been …
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Funny 2019 Fantasy Football Team Names: U.S. Politics Edition
With the primaries approaching for the 2020 U.S. Presidential election, we’ve been hearing a lot of great slogans that would also make funny 2019 fantasy football team names. This inspired …
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Madden ’20 Soft Skills Revealed!
Training camps have kicked off, diva players have arrived in typical fashion, and we are days away from Madden ’20 being released. If it weren’t for Madden, fans would never …
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2019 NFC Championship and AFC Championship Predictions
You might say these 2019 NFC and AFC championship predictions are way too early. We say we’re just preparing for when the NFL expands to a 7-month season. Mike Maxwell …
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Miami Dolphins 2019 Mock Draft
We are just about one month out from the NFL draft, a special three-day event where NFL analysts line up their insights mixed with some good ol’ fashioned intuition. We’ll …
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2019 Super Bowl LIII Predictions from Comedians
2019 Super Bowl LIII Predictions The Los Angeles Rams made it to the Super Bowl despite losing the popular vote. Now, the entire world will watch them square off against …
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Dallas Cowboys / Indianapolis Colts / Kansas City Chiefs / Los Angeles Chargers / Los Angeles Rams / New England Patriots / New Orleans Saints / Philadelphia Eagles / Playoffs / Predictions
Super Bowl Predictions
Super Bowl Predictions We were wondering: is there an article we can make that ensures all of us, save maybe one, look like fools? Then it hit us: Super Bowl …
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Dallas Cowboys / Indianapolis Colts / Kansas City Chiefs / Los Angeles Chargers / Los Angeles Rams / New England Patriots / New Orleans Saints / Philadelphia Eagles / Playoffs / Predictions
2019 NFL Divisional Round Predictions
2019 NFL Divisional Round Predictions Last week’s wild card picks were a breeze! Everyone knew that the struggling Eagles would best the vaunted #1 Bears defense. That Indianapolis’ spotty D …
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Baltimore Ravens / Chicago Bears / Dallas Cowboys / Houston Texans / Indianapolis Colts / Los Angeles Chargers / Philadelphia Eagles / Playoffs / Predictions / Seattle Seahawks
Football Absurdity Experts’ 2019 NFL Wild Card Predictions
2019 NFL Wild Card Predictions We know it’s a week late but we think the song that should kick off the NFL playoffs is ‘It’s the most wonderful time of …
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Sorry for Your Loss Week 14 – The Philadelphia Eagles Season Is over
What a difference a year makes. This time last year Eagles fans were mourning the loss of their star QB and abandoning all hope as some dude name Nick Foles …
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Sorry for Your Loss Week 13: The Green Bay Packers’ Season Is Over
Sorry for Your Loss Week 13: The Green Bay Packers’ Season Is Over Week 13 is in the books and it’s a painful column to write this week. I, an …
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Sorry for Your Loss Week 12: The Atlanta Falcons Season is Over
The Atlanta Falcons Season is Over What a weekend. Week 12 in the NFL felt very much like a full week of football. We’re on the cusp of the pretenders …
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Sorry for Your Loss: Washington Redskins Season Ended Week 11
Washington Redskins Season Ended Week 11 Welcome back survivalists! Week 11 has provided some very compelling wins and losses to the playoff picture. I was on the fence about which …
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Sorry for Your Loss – Survivor Pool Week 10
Sorry for Your Loss: Survivor Pool Week 10 This is an interesting time for the NFL season in terms of survivor pool excitement. Teams are starting to deal with the …
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Sorry for Your Loss (Week 9): Broncos’ Playoff Chances Are Now Super-Horrible
Week 9 Deals a Crushing Blow for Broncos’ Playoff Chances What a crazy weekend for the one team in the AFC West that seems hellbent on building a Mount Rushmore …
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Sorry for your loss: The Bucs Are the NFL’s Biggest Week 8 Failure
Bucs Fail! If you missed it, we’re halfway done now with the NFL season. Thirty-two teams no longer all have a shot. Frankly, half of the league is already pinning …
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Football Bust Kool-Aid: Who you slurpin’?
The NFL (and football bust) season is just a few short weeks away from kickoff and the preseason hype is nearing peak ripeness. There’s a football bustle in the air …
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2018 NFL Free Agency Quarterbacks
The celebratory debauchery should be almost washed away in Philly and now it’s on to the dreaded business side of the game for 31 teams who failed last year. If …
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