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30 Team Parlay: Week 2 NFL Betting Tips
Brandon Andreasen previews week 2 of the NFL betting season.
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Atlanta Falcons / Carolina Panthers / New Orleans Saints / NFC / NFC South / Predictions / Tampa Bay Buccaneers / Team Preview
30 Team Parlay: NFC South Overs/Unders
Welcome to the Thirty Team Parlay, a weekly column on Football Absurdity that focuses on the week in football gambling. We’ll bring you the best bets, biggest longshots, and try …
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AFC / AFC West / Comedy / Denver Broncos / Football / Kansas City Chiefs / Las Vegas Raiders / Los Angeles Chargers / Team Preview / Teams
NFL Quarter Season: AFC West Review
We are a quarter of the way through the 2017 NFL Season and nothing has gone as expected. Just the way we like it. The only thing predicable about the …
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Arizona Cardinals / Comedy / Fantasy Football / Football / Los Angeles Rams / NFC / NFC West / San Francisco 49ers / Seattle Seahawks / Team Preview / Teams / Weekly Recap
NFL Quarter Season: NFC West Review
We are a quarter of the way through the 2017 NFL Season and nothing has gone as expected. Just the way we like it. The only thing predicable about the …
Read More
Atlanta Falcons / Carolina Panthers / Comedy / Football / New Orleans Saints / NFC / NFC South / Tampa Bay Buccaneers / Team Preview / Teams
NFL Quarter Season: NFC South Review
We are a quarter of the way through the 2017 NFL Season and nothing has gone as expected. Just the way we like it. The only thing predicable about the …
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AFC / AFC South / Comedy / Football / Houston Texans / Indianapolis Colts / Jacksonville Jaguars / Power Rankings / Team Preview / Teams / Tennessee Titans
NFL Quarter Season: AFC South Review
We are a quarter of the way through the 2017 NFL Season and nothing has gone as expected. Just the way we like it. The only thing predicable about the …
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AFC / AFC North / Baltimore Ravens / Cincinnati Bengals / Cleveland Browns / Comedy / Football / Pittsburgh Steelers / Power Rankings / Team Preview / Teams
NFL Quarter Season: AFC North Review
We are a quarter of the way through the 2017 NFL Season and nothing has gone as expected. Just the way we like it. The only thing predicable about the …
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Chicago Bears / Comedy / Detroit Lions / Football / Green Bay Packers / Minnesota Vikings / NFC / NFC North / Power Rankings / Team Preview / Teams
NFL Quarter Season: NFC North Review
We are a quarter of the way through the 2017 NFL Season and nothing has gone as expected. Just the way we like it. The only thing predicable about the …
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Jacksonville Jaguars 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
The Jaguars are a got dang mess, and I wouldn’t recommend drafting anyone with a JAC next to their name except Leonard Fournette this fantasy football season. So I’m stashing …
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Houston Texans 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
The Texans thought it would be a great idea to trot Brock Osweiler out last year after being embarrassed by the likes of Ryan Mallett and Brian Hoyer in 2015. …
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Indianapolis Colts 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
Andrew Luck’s currently the NFL’s Schrodinger’s Quarterback. He’ll be fine, or he’ll miss a bunch of time. Or he won’t miss much? His labrum tear will tear the team’s fantasy …
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Tennessee Titans 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
We all pretty much openly mocked “exotic smash mouth” last season, but it served the Tennessee Titans well, and they did it without any real receiving help. Flash back to …
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Tampa Bay Buccaneers 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
The Tampa Bay Buccaneers loaded their offense up this season to give Jameis Winston no excuses, but something not being given hasn’t stopped him from taking things in the past. …
Read More Carolina Panthers 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
Who are the 2017 Panthers? Will Christian McCaffery dominate? Will Cam rebound? Will Kelvin Benjamin step away from the buffet long enough to catch a pass? Is Jonathon Stewart going …
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New Orleans Saints 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
The New Orleans Saints with Drew Brees and Sean Payton have habitually had one of the most potent offenses in the NFL, and that is unlikely to change this season. …
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Atlanta Falcons 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
The Atlanta Falcons face 2017 bearing the weight of two major losses: OC Kyle Shanahan (to San Francisco) and a 28-3 lead in the Super Bowl (to New England). Now …
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New York Jets 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
J-E-T-S! Are a MESS MESS MESS! There’s no better way to describe this team than with a deep sigh of resignation. Their top QB is a second-round pick who can’t …
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Miami Dolphins 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
The Dolphins lost Ryan Tannehill for the season with a knee injury, so obviously they turned to Colin Kaepernick. Kaepernick, the former San Francisco starter turned activist, had a mixed …
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Buffalo Bills 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
Full disclosure: I wrote this like three weeks ago and the Buffalo Bills have basically imploded since then. They traded Sammy Watkins, they had Anquan Boldin come and go (and …
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New England Patriots 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
Full disclosure, the Julian Edelman injury caused me to entirely rewrite this article, that’s how deep and confusing the labyrinthian scheming of Belichick dives. Losing one slot player means he …
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New York Giants 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
The New York Giants last season had only one player worth playing, and that was super phenom Odell Beckham, Jr. This is with good reason, as the Giants ran 25 …
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Philadelphia Eagles 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
The Philadelphia Eagles are in a transition year, with an ascendant quarterback, a plethora of wide receivers and a muddled-as-heck backfield. The two biggest named wide receivers and two of …
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Washington Redskins 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
Washington had all the accolades heading into this fantasy football draft season, but no first-team offense has fallen as hard on its face as they have through two preseason games. …
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Dallas Cowboys 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
America’s Team had two rookies blow the doors off fantasy football season, with both Dak Prescott and Ezekiel Elliott finishing as solid starters at their positions. Fast forward a season …
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Cleveland Browns 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
The Factory of Sadness, the Mistake By the Lake, the team that sounds like it’s named after poop. The Browns have a lot of nicknames, and none of them are …
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Baltimore Ravens 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
The Baltimore Ravens have been extremely snake-bitten and 2017 is lost before it even started. They’ve lost more people for the season than the Boston Alt-Right Rally even had holed …
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Cincinnati Bengals 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
Two years ago, the Cincinnati Bengals were humming right along, with QB Andy Dalton as a top-five quarterback. He broke his thumb and everything went off the rails. The Bengals …
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Pittsburgh Steelers 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
It seems as though every fantasy football draft season, we all go ga-ga for the Steelers offense, with good reason. They have two players in the unquestioned top-five in all …
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2017 Green Bay Packers Fantasy Football Preview
The Packers have been one of the most prolific offenses in the NFL under the guidance of all-timer Aaron Rodgers, and this season is no different. There are a ton …
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2017 Minnesota Vikings Fantasy Football Preview
The Minnesota Vikings may have quietly put together a formidable fantasy football juggernaut thanks to the amazing quarterback play of Sam Bra–hahaha, sorry. They turned the team into a bunch …
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2017 Chicago Bears Fantasy Football Preview
I honestly wouldn’t bother with a Chicago Bear outside of Jordan Howard this season. The team is an absolute mess but if you insist on not listening to me, fine, …
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2017 Detroit Lions Fantasy Football Preview
The Detroit Lions lost Calvin Johnson two years ago, inherited Jim Bob Cooter as their offensive coordinator, and immediately changed how the team operated. Gone were the long bombs from …
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Los Angeles Chargers 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
The Los Angeles Chargers abandoned the confines of San Diego and moved up north to LA… to… play in a soccer stadium? This is the type of hype-to-reality crashing down …
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Kansas City Chiefs 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
Since we last saw the Kansas City Chiefs, they have intentionally setup their team to move on from the current on-field regime. They jettisoned Jeremy Maclin for Tyreek Hill, they …
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Denver Broncos 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
There’s so much up in the air for the Broncos this season, with the backfield and the quarterback situation in complete flux. That’s been the situation for a couple years …
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Oakland Raiders 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
The Oakland Raiders have a myriad of fantasy football options for you this season. Amari Cooper, Marshawn Lynch and Michael Crabtree all get drafted very highly. Throw in Derek Carr …
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Seattle Seahawks 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
The Seattle Seahawks have been a fantasy football enigma recently, with Jimmy Graham, Russell Wilson, Thomas Rawls, Christine “The Woke One” Michael all had their fantasy value wildly vacillate last …
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San Francisco 49ers 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
I’m a 49ers fan, so it’s easy to tell me that I’m biased about their fantasy football prospects. Let me get this out of the way: they suck. They’re bad. …
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Arizona Cardinals 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
Despite the massive regression from starting quarterback/AARP junk mail recipient Carson Palmer, the drunk driving (and uselessness) of Michael Floyd and the sudden shattering of John Brown, the Arizona Cardinals …
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Los Angeles Rams 2017 Fantasy Football Preview
The 2016 Rams were one of the most useless 2016 teams for fantasy football and in real football. And in making interesting Hard Knocks. And interesting All or Nothing. They …
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