We are a quarter of the way through the 2017 NFL Season and nothing has gone as expected. Just the way we like it. The only thing predicable about the NFL is how unpredictable it is. So let’s take a look at where it all went wrong for the teams with our AFC North review of the quarter point of the season.
Pittsburgh Steelers (3-1)
The quarter point for the Pittsburgh Steelers can only be viewed as a colossal disappointment. Yes, they just beat the Baltimore Ravens in a battle for first place in the division. Yes, they appear to be the front-runner to win the mediocre AFC North. But they also lost to the Chicago Bear. I repeat, they lost to the Chicago Bears. That alone invalidates any success they have had this season.
Baltimore Ravens (2-2)
It’s a tale of two quarters for the Baltimore Ravens. For the first two games, you might have been convinced they were a good team. But beating the Cincinnati Bengals and Cleveland Browns doesn’t mean you are good at football. It just means that you aren’t the worst at football. To put this team in perspective, they lost to the Jacksonville Jaguars. They might be the second best team in the AFC North, but what does that really mean? It’s like having the flu. Yeah, you aren’t going to die, but at least you don’t have leprosy like the Browns. Leprosy that gives people mrsa. But you still kind of suck.
Cincinnati Bengals (1-3)
Now technically, the Cincinnati Bengals are 1-3, but since their one win came against the Cleveland Browns, I think it is safe to say they are really just 0-3. We all know beating the Browns doesn’t really count as a win. Let’s recap the Bengals first four games. First, they got embarrassed in their first two games of the season. Then, they snatched defeat from the jaws of victory against the Green Bay Packers in the most spectacular fashion. And now that they beat the Cleveland Browns, we are supposed to think they aren’t as bad as we thought? They are as bad as we thought.
Cleveland Browns (0-4)
The more things change, the more they stay the same. In the Baltimore Ravens recap, I called the Cleveland Browns leprosy. But that isn’t really fair to leprosy. Leprosy can be treated. Leprosy can be cured. No, the Cleveland Browns are like the MRSA they give to their players. They are a staph infection that could turn you septic and make your blood literally try to kill you. And the more you try to kill it, the more resistant it becomes. To help you understand just how resistant to winning the Cleveland Browns are, Hue Jackson took an awful team in Oakland, devoid of talent and hope, and was able to make them 8-8. Many sports fans considered his coaching performance to be nothing short of miraculous. In a similar situation as the coach of the Cleveland Browns, Hue Jackson is 1-19. Because the only hope in Cleveland is that one day you might die.
