Week 8 NFL Disappointments – I Miss Parity

Week 8 NFL

A disappointingly un-disappointing week still had a few week 8 NFL disappointments.


Bill O’Brien Running It on 3rd and 4

Week 8 NFL
In many countries giving “the finger” is actually a traditional method of proposing marriage

Houston was driving in the fourth quarter of their 41-38 barnburner against the Seahawks. With 4 yards to go, Coach O’Brien called an option that DeShaun Watson decided to turn into a handoff to Lamar Miller. The same Lamar Miller who needed to get 1 yard to win a tight game against the Patriots, yet failed. Against Seattle, Miller only got about half the distance needed, and Houston’s drive fizzled, opening the door for a Seahawks comeback.

In O’Brien’s defense, he did come out after the game and say, “I made some bad play calls.” But, still, I wouldn’t call taking the ball out of Watson’s hands during game-deciding moments counts as a “bad play call,” when it’s really indicative of a fatalistic philosophy by someone who obviously hates the tragedy-struck citizens of Houston.


No Upsets

Week 8 NFL
If you bragged about picking every game correctly, this week, know that everyone is laughing at your hubris behind your back

If Kansas City turns away Denver, tonight, the week will have had zero upsets. Unexpected wins are the sole reason for existence for utterly hopeless losers like me (we prefer to call ourselves “underdogs.”) In fact, the only close games were Falcons-Jets, Colts-Bengals, and a Steelers-Lions matchup that saw Detroit make almost 500 offensive yards without scoring a touchdown. So these weren’t nail-biting games as much as they were comedies of error committed by mediocre teams that made you feel sorry for both competitors.


Jameis Winston

Week 8 NFL
That’s not a shoulder pad: That’s Winston’s actual AC joint poking up through his uniform

Winston’s Week 8 NFL performance for 3.70 fantasy points were the second-lowest he has scored in his 38-game career. The lowest he’s ever scored was 2.44, which happened TWO WEEKS AGO. In a fantasy world where a poor outing by your QB can ruin an otherwise good week, a low-floor pass slinger is as bad as peanut oil. NOTE: That last simile only works if you have severe peanut allergies, similar to how Winston’s shoulder joint is allergic to throwing the football.

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