Week 3 Fantasy Football Puzzles

It’s the middle of the week, we are on an island as far away from Sunday’s boatload of games as possible. To keep your minds sharp, try these week 3 fantasy football puzzles. Or don’t, I already got your article click, anyway! Muhahahaha!

Drop Quotes

“Gosh darnit!”

Alvin Kamara closed his locker and peered around the corner. There sat Taysom Hill, furiously chewing on a pencil and staring at a piece of paper.

“What’s the problem, Taysom?” Alvin inquired, inquisitively

“These drop quote puzzles are too hard!” Taysom Hill.

“Remember the thirty-first rule of the New Orleans Saints Club for Pencil Puzzles and Word Games,” replied Alvin, putting on his bifocals and taking the paper from Taysom, “if the puzzle isn’t fun, take a break!”

“I would know that rule if you would let me in!” Taysom shouted, unnecessarily.

“I’ll let you in if you can solve these drop quotes. Simply take each letter and put it in a box in the same column. When you’re done, you should have a fantasy football-related quote,” explained Alvin with a condescending tone that doesn’t quite come through with the written word.

“Delightful!” shrieked Taysom, “I’ll out-puzzle you, yet!”

Can you help Taysom get into the New Orleans Saints Club for Pencil Puzzles and Word Games?

(Matthew Berry)

(Waleed Ismail)

(Jeff Krisko)

Answers here

 

Cryptolists

Nervously, the assistant rolled the wheelbarrow full of papers down the hallway. Reaching the end, he slowly pushed open an ornate, gold-plated door.

“BLARGLE?”

“I have those documents you requested, Mr. Gase,” answered the assistant.

“BLARGLE GARGLE GARGLE!” shouted Adam Gase, a trail of green goop dripping from his eyes and mouth.

“Yes, these are the lists of fantasy football players you requested.”

“SNOOF WAAAAAAAW!” replied Gase, pensively.

“Yes, I made sure to put them in code, as you asked. Each of these lists contains items that use the same cryptogram letter substitution.”

With a creak, Gase unhinged his jaw. Taking a snow shovel from behind the door, the assistant began shoveling the wheelbarrow full of papers into Gase’s gaping gullet.

“Not sure how this is supposed to help us win games,” muttered the assistant, “but, hey, it’s a living.”

Category: Top 10 Running Backs on the Season (HPPR)

B B C F I    K F I P J

B S O D I    L B V B C B

T Q C D J R D B I    V T T B H H C P U

K F J Q    K B T F E J

P Y P L D P S    P S S D F R R

C B Q P P V    V F J R P C R

T Q C D J    T B C J F I

X B S O D I    T F F L

L B C P P V    Q N I R

I D T L    T Q N E E

 

Category: Players we “staked our reputation on” in the preseason during our podcast

R X Q T    G Z Z J M

Y G H J J C    T E M V

P G Z Z G Q    I X J P J H V

C U Y J    I J Q U D Y U

I G H P M J H    C U M Q T J N

P U X M V G J    R X T M Q X M

R G C J Q    D X M M J H

 

Category: Fantasy-Relevant Players Named after Their Dad

V M U O F B U    X R F A W B N

H O B I I    Q B E J W M X

O T    E W M U J

O M U U B I I    W B F O B U A H F

X M U P R F    T H F B A

I M P R A J M    A W B F M L I D

X M U J    R F V U M X

D H O O    V L U I B K

U H F M I O    T H F B A

X B I P R F    V H U O H F

(Encoded with help from Wordles)

Solutions here

These puzzles were made with http://puttzy.com/puzzles/dropquote/creater.php

If these week 3 fantasy football puzzles have you hankerin’ for some fantasy sports, try out Fan Duel! That link lets them know we sent you! It also gets you $5 bonus cash to play with if you make a deposit.

Then, follow Football Absurdity on Twitter!

After that, get free fantasy football advice by joining our Discord! Also taking suggestions for future puzzle formats, again via Discord!

Finally, if you like what you read here, check out our podcast and our Patreon

Leave a Reply