Sorry for Your Loss: Survivor Pool Week 10
This is an interesting time for the NFL season in terms of survivor pool excitement. Teams are starting to deal with the grips of reality and as ‘Sorry for Your Loss’ points out, it’s over for a team that on paper is still mathematically alive. Next week is Thanksgiving and maybe then this team and its fans can be thankful, probably that it’s almost over. I am so sorry for your loss, Miami Dolphins. Your season is over. Way over. Start planning your draft weekend. The season is over for anyone who picked Miami this week in their survivor pool. Sorry for your loss.
Full disclosure, I rooted for the Dolphins for over ten years as my brother and I had a sports team divorce in the early 90’s. Rooting for the Dolphins, with Marino, taught me to realize not all greatness will be rewarded. Also, it taught me to never root for a team in turquoise again.
This week, the Dolphins jumped on the plane and caught a cold weather, yet not terrible, Wisconsin game in Green Bay. This franchise can’t travel to the cold, ever. Then you add to the fact that the fins are banged up more than the pickups in the Lambeau lot. Miami entered 5-4 and looking to stay in the playoff picture. Green Bay, just getting dumped by New England last week needed a quick fix, who cares if it was an ugly win.
The Food Network has a long-running show called ‘Chopped.’ It’s where chefs get a basket of mystery items that really shouldn’t go together and have to somehow make it into a wonderful meal. This is exactly how the Miami front office has run their roster since 1995. Let’s draft a QB who can’t name all the teams in our division, hire an offensive minded coach, trade away his top WR’s, overpay for defensive lineman and then roll the dice with a QB the Browns wouldn’t even let snap the ball.
Truth be told there’s some bright spots in Miami. The brightest is Frank Gore who broke another record this weekend and likely took the Miami contract so he can look for a retirement home on the off days. Osweiler had 213 years with three missing linemen! Wait… I meant 213 yards, not years… but it felt like 213 years. If you’re new to football, they have five on the line.
They may win two more games this season which means the Dolphins will finish with their trademark 7-9 record. The only way the Dolphins can more embody being mediocre is if their games were to be played at a Holiday Inn Express. There should be no surprise that the Dolphins will choke out the back half of the season. This is a team that chose their mascot to be riding off into the sunset. It doesn’t quite exude the killer whale confidence they want.
Take comfort Dolphins fans. Santa is coming and soon under the tree you’ll find a new coach, new QB, a RB under the age of 30, and maybe maybe, a wild card next year. But for those of you still alive in your survivor pool, think hard before slotting in the Dolphins.
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