Recently, a super duper certified Brain Genius New York Jets fan tried to convince me, and others, that they were a Kirk Cousins away from making the AFC playoffs next year. The obvious response to that is that the New York Jets are one of the most talent-starved rosters in the entirety of the NFL. This made for the disaster draft preparation for them exceptionally difficult. This roster is bad. It’s so bad, in fact, I had to make a third, punitive, category to go with “No Doubters” and “More-Than-Likely Staying.” In the event of a disaster draft, as outlined in the rules I made up for this dumb game that shows how much I hate myself, these are the players the New York Jets should opt to protect.
Lost to Free Agency: Muhammad Wilkerson, Josh McCown, Robby Anderson’s Filter, Demario Davis, Austin Seferian-Jenkins, Mo Claiborne, Kony Ealy
The No Doubters:
If the Jets have a strength (emphasis on if), it’s on defense. They drafted two extremely talented safeties in the 2017 draft to pair with CB Buster Skrine and the extremely talented Leonard Williams up front. Steve McLendon made this list instead of the “more-than-likely” staying not because he is exceptionally talented, but because I felt bad for the Jets having only four no doubters.
The More-Than-Likely Staying:
The Jets petitioned with the league to not protect sixteen players because they didn’t think it was worth the time and effort to debate whether or not they should hang onto Elijah McGuire or Bryce Petty. Beachum is usually good (not last year); Winters and Carpenter are usually good (not last year). Jermaine Kearse was involved in the Sheldon Richardson trade last year, and the Jets will keep him out of pure stubbornness. Bilal Powell was touted as the running back of the future last year, and he is also thirty this year. The rest of these guys are the perfect bad team intersection of cheap and talented. Robby Anderson will get cut, though, if he screams at another police officer (or shot).
And the punitive category… for taking him in the second round and burying him as deep on their roster as they possibly can, hoping he never sees the light of day….
He’s so bad! The Jets deserve to be stuck with him forever. They will either be thrilled by being forced to keep him, or they will be thrilled by their continuing long play to keep Christian Hackenberg benched until he retires. This way, nobody in the league can see how terrible he is and point and laugh at the Jets.
Not good enough to make it on the Jets. Wowee. Good luck, fellas.