There’s no getting around it: things are bad out there. Everyone is hurt, or everyone’s quarterback is hurt, or everyone just plain sucks. It’s bad out there in the streets, with no clear fantasy football breakout in the first two weeks of the season (maybe Malik Nabers?). Let’s try to breathe some life into rosters by highlighting players available in at least 50% of Yahoo! leagues, and one player per position available in at least 90% of leagues!
Quarterbacks
Geno Smith (40% rostered) versus Miami
Do you want to get about 17.86 fantasy points? Then Geno Smith is your guy. In week one, he finished with 17.84; last week, he finished with 17.88. He did this in two different ways: he had a 32-yard rushing touchdown in week one, and he threw for 327 and a touchdown in week two. That makes him a versatile weapon. While Miami held Trevor Lawrence and Josh Allen in check (Lawrence held in check, Josh Allen relegated to watching as James Cook scored three touchdowns), it’s a new dolphin sheriff down in Dolphinville (the new name of Hard Rock Stadium). Skylar Thompson will get the start for Miami in this one, and the Seahawks defense will reward Miami by giving the Miami defense a lot of short fields to defend against as Skylar (likely) vomits on himself. With Kenneth Walker banged up at best, and potentially not playing, expect a bunch of Geno Smith this weekend against Miami.
Sam Darnold (25% rostered) versus Houston
Darnold moonwalked all over the 49ers last weekend, and the Texans are basically the southern version of the 49ers. The Niners previously employed DeMeco Ryans, who built their defense in his image. Now, Darnold gets to take on the real DeMeco Ryans and his defense this week. Darnold has at least 200 yards and 2 touchdowns in each of his first two games this season. That might not sound like a lot, but only Sam Darnold and Derek Carr have pulled that off twice so far this season.
Gardner Minshew (7% rostered) at Carolina
At this point, you’re going to pick on anyone going up against the Panthers. They “only” yielded 11 fantasy points to Justin Herbert last week because J.K Dobbins was too busy mercilessly and repeatedly beating them with a hammer to the tune of 130 rushing yards. In week one, Derek Carr finished 5th in fantasy points per dropback against the Panthers en route to a 21 fantasy point day. In week two, Justin Herbert was 8th in fantasy points per dropback last week, at 0.59. So, the bad defense was there, he just didn’t get to take advantage of it. Gardner Minshew will have every opportunity to take advantage of this woeful defense, as the Vegas running game is still yet to get it together. Expect a big game out of Minshew in this one.
Wide Receivers
Alec Pierce (46% rostered) versus Chicago
I’m a bit flabbergasted to find Pierce here down under 50% rostership through two weeks. He is WR10, 0.7 fantasy points behind Jameson Williams (86% rostered). He’s tied for first in wide receiver touchdowns, sixth in receiving yards, and 23rd in receptions. Through two games, he has a 39.4% air yards share (22nd) and 3.62 yards per route run (7th among receivers with at least 30 routes run). The Bears are a strong defense, but the fast track in Indianapolis gives me hope that Pierce will make it three-for-three in double-digit fantasy point games.
Gabe Davis (32% rostered) at Buffalo
Gabe Davis leads the Jaguars in targets. It’s hard to believe, but it’s true. Granted, he only has ten on the season, but still. That isn’t likely to change anytime soon, as Evan Engram won’t play in this game, Christian Kirk seemingly hasn’t figured out that the season has started (7 targets for 2 catches and 29 yards in two games), and Brian Thomas is a speedy deep threat receiver. He should lead the Jaguars in targets, and that doesn’t even get into ~the narrative~. It’s a revenge game for Davis, who spent his first few seasons in the league in Buffalo. The Jags have to go at least a little bit out of their way to get him some targets, and the Bills’ porous pass defense will likely do very little to stop them.
Elijah Moore (2% rostered) versus N.Y. Giants
Moore is 23rd in the NFL with 14 targets through two games. Granted, he didn’t do much with it in week one (3 catches for 9 yards versus Dallas), but he turned in a decent PPR game last week to the tune of 6 catches for 44 yards against the Jaguars. This week, he gets a leaky Jaguars’ pass defense whose season rank benefits from playing Kliff Kingsbury’s Not Real Totally Fake Scheme in week two after giving up two touchdowns to receivers in week one.
Running Backs
Bucky Irving (34% rostered) versus Denver
At this point, Bucky Irving is going to make this list right up until he steals the job from Rachaad White. And once that happens, all of you who stashed him can pat yourselves on the back. White is one of the worst rushing running backs in the NFL, with his pass-catching chops as the only thing that garners him accolades. Irving is a better runner, and his 5.3 yards per attempt are more than double that of Rachaad White’s so far this year. If he doesn’t break out against Denver, then congratulations, I planted a virus that got you one of the best backs to stash in the league.
Jaleel McLaughlin (29% rostered) versus Tampa Bay
The Tampa Bay Buccaneers have allowed the second-most fantasy points to running backs thus far this season, which is a ranking that the Broncos will press this week. In 2023, they had the most running back touches. The first two weeks haven’t gone as planned for the Broncos, but given that their entire offense is hot garbage, they will likely press on the running back advantage in this one. McLaughlin and Javonte Williams are jostling for RB1 on the roster, and you can get in cheap on this battle that McLaughlin might just steal away from Javonte. Worst case scenario, you’ll get about 40% of the running back touches, as the split is currently 25 touches to Williams and 18 touches to McLaughlin.
D’Onta Foreman (6% rostered) versus N.Y. Giants
Through two weeks, the Browns’ backfield is anybody’s guess. But, let’s just take a look at the trends. In week one, the Browns were chasing points the whole game (losing 17-33 in a game that was never close). Ford played 75% of snaps, and Foreman played just one snap. Then, in week two, Ford played 44% of snaps, and Foreman played 38% of snaps. While Ford was still the lead back in terms of snaps played, he still took a back seat in touches (15 for Foreman, 8 for Ford) and especially in the fourth quarter (four for Foreman, one for Ford) as the Browns salted the game away.
With the Browns taking on the woeful Giants this week, I expect this to be a “salt the game away” sort of week. That makes Foreman the back to start against this Giants team that has allowed at least 109 yards to two different backs in two weeks this season.
Tight Ends
Mike Gesicki (29% rostered) versus Washington
While I’ve been very clear this week that the thesis behind Mike Gesicki’s big week two (9 targets, 7 receptions, and 91 receiving yards) had more to do with a temporary depletion of assets in the Bengals’ passing game and the semi-permanent depletion of the Chiefs’ ability to defend tight ends, I am going back to the well this week. The Commanders’ pass defense is dreadful. While they haven’t yielded a lot of tight end fantasy points (#32 in fantasy points allowed) that has more to do with the fact that they’ve played Cade “just runnin’ around” Otton (0.15 targets per route run in 2023) and Daniel Bellinger so far. They’ve faced one tight end target. Their TE-specific statistics truly do not matter.
Zach Ertz (11% rostered) at Cincinnati
Some idiot said that Zach Ertz wouldn’t steal from Ben Sinnott this season and that he would be too old to matter. Two games into the season and that idiot, whoever he might be, wherever he might be, was totally incorrect. Ertz is second only to Terry McLaurin in routes run for the Commanders so far this season, and it’s by a wide margin. McLaurin has 55 routes on the season, Ertz has 51, and Luke McCaffrey and Dyami Brown sit in third place with just 35 routes run. He’s highly involved in the Commanders’ offense, garnering the second-most targets on the team. Ertz will be highly involved in this offense because they don’t really have a choice other than that.
Jonnu Smith (7% rostered) at Seattle
This one is fun because the Dolphins getting worse might make Jonnu Smith more powerful. He had five of his seven targets with Skylar Thompson and finished with 7 targets, 6 catches, and 53 yards. He had a good tight end fantasy day (5 catches, 46 yards) before the Dolphins lost Tua. Given Thompson’s limitations, Smith likely gets an outsized role yet again this week. The Seahawks are quietly a good tight end matchup, allowing the seventh-most points to the position in the league while playing against Greg Dulcich and Hunter Henry in weeks one and two. And if you’re following along at home… yes, they gave up the 8/109 game to Henry last week.
