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Football Absurdity teams
10
bn
6
mon
0
qb
1
rb
2
wr
2
te
1
rw
0
wt
0
rwt
1
qrwt
0
patd
4
rutd
6
retd
6
payd
0.04
ruyd
0.1
reyd
0.1
att
0
cmp
0
inc
0
int
-1
car
0
fum
-2
rec
0.5
Updated September 10 2026
QUARTERBACK
VALUE TM NAME PTS/WK #
$ 0 BUF Josh Allen +4.1 1
$ 0 BAL Lamar Jackson +1.4 2
$ 0 NE Drake Maye +1.2 3
$ 0 WAS Jayden Daniels +1.2 4
$ 0 PHI Jalen Hurts +1.1 5
$ 0 CIN Joe Burrow +0.5 6
$ 0 NYG Jaxson Dart +0.5 7
$ 0 SF Brock Purdy +0.3 8
$ 0 JAC Trevor Lawrence +0.3 9
$ 0 DAL Dak Prescott +0.2 10
$ 0 KC Patrick Mahomes +0.0 11
$ -0 CHI Caleb Williams -0.0 12
$ -0 LAC Justin Herbert -0.1 13
$ -0 DEN Bo Nix -0.2 14
$ -0 MIN Kyler Murray -0.6 15
$ -0 LAR Matthew Stafford -0.6 16
$ -0 DET Jared Goff -0.8 17
$ -0 NO Tyler Shough -1.0 18
$ -0 TB Baker Mayfield -1.1 19
$ -0 GB Jordan Love -1.6 20
TIGHT END
VALUE TM NAME PTS/WK #
$ 0 ARI Trey McBride +3.4 1
$ 0 LV Brock Bowers +2.8 2
$ 0 CHI Colston Loveland +1.7 3
$ 0 IND Tyler Warren +0.9 4
$ 0 SF George Kittle +0.8 5
$ 0 CLE Harold Fannin Jr. +0.8 6
$ 0 DET Sam LaPorta +0.4 7
$ 0 ATL Kyle Pitts +0.3 8
$ 0 PHI Dallas Goedert +0.2 9
$ 0 KC Travis Kelce +0.0 10
$ 0 GB Tucker Kraft +0.0 11
$ -0 BAL Mark Andrews -0.4 12
$ -0 NYG Isaiah Likely -0.6 13
$ -0 BUF Dalton Kincaid -0.7 14
$ -0 DAL Jake Ferguson -0.8 15
RUNNING BACK
VALUE TM NAME PTS/WK #
$ 0 DET Jahmyr Gibbs +10.1 1
$ 0 ATL Bijan Robinson +8.6 2
$ 0 SF Christian McCaffrey +7.2 3
$ 0 IND Jonathan Taylor +6.9 4
$ 0 BAL Derrick Henry +5.5 5
$ 0 MIA De'Von Achane +5.1 6
$ 0 BUF James Cook +4.9 7
$ 0 CIN Chase Brown +4.4 8
$ 0 PHI Saquon Barkley +4.2 9
$ 0 KC Kenneth Walker +3.8 10
$ 0 LV Ashton Jeanty +3.5 11
$ 0 LAC Omarion Hampton +3.3 12
$ 0 DAL Javonte Williams +3.2 13
$ 0 ARI Jeremiyah Love +3.1 14
$ 0 NYJ Breece Hall +2.9 15
$ 0 LAR Kyren Williams +2.7 16
$ 0 NO Travis Etienne +2.5 17
$ 0 NYG Cam Skattebo +2.3 18
$ 0 CHI D'Andre Swift +1.9 19
$ 0 CLE Quinshon Judkins +1.6 20
$ 0 TB Bucky Irving +1.6 21
$ 0 JAC Bhayshul Tuten +1.4 22
$ 0 HOU David Montgomery +0.6 23
$ 0 SEA Jadarian Price +0.1 24
$ 0 PIT Jaylen Warren +0.1 25
$ 0 NE Rhamondre Stevenson +0.1 26
$ 0 TEN Tony Pollard +0.0 27
$ -0 NE TreVeyon Henderson -0.2 28
$ -0 DEN J.K. Dobbins -0.4 29
$ -0 PIT Rico Dowdle -0.4 30
$ -0 CAR Chuba Hubbard -0.9 31
$ -0 GB MarShawn Lloyd -1.2 32
$ -0 CAR Jonathon Brooks -1.2 33
$ -0 TB Kenneth Gainwell -1.6 34
$ -0 CHI Kyle Monangai -1.7 35
$ -0 WAS Rachaad White -1.7 36
$ -0 WAS Jacory Croskey-Merritt -1.8 37
$ -0 MIN Aaron Jones -1.8 38
$ -0 DEN RJ Harvey -2.0 39
$ -0 MIN Jordan Mason -2.0 40
$ -0 LAR Blake Corum -2.3 41
$ -0 GB Josh Jacobs -2.7 42
WIDE RECEIVER
VALUE TM NAME PTS/WK #
$ 0 LAR Puka Nacua +6.9 1
$ 0 CIN Ja'Marr Chase +6.0 2
$ 0 SEA Jaxon Smith-Njigba +5.7 3
$ 0 DET Amon-Ra St. Brown +5.1 4
$ 0 ATL Drake London +3.1 5
$ 0 DAL CeeDee Lamb +2.9 6
$ 0 MIN Justin Jefferson +2.9 7
$ 0 KC Rashee Rice +2.7 8
$ 0 NO Chris Olave +2.5 9
$ 0 NE A.J. Brown +2.3 10
$ 0 DAL George Pickens +2.2 11
$ 0 HOU Nico Collins +2.1 12
$ 0 BAL Zay Flowers +1.6 13
$ 0 NYG Malik Nabers +1.5 14
$ 0 NYJ Garrett Wilson +1.2 15
$ 0 CAR Tetairoa McMillan +1.1 16
$ 0 PHI DeVonta Smith +1.1 17
$ 0 TB Emeka Egbuka +1.0 18
$ 0 LAR Davante Adams +0.8 19
$ 0 CIN Tee Higgins +0.7 20
$ 0 DET Jameson Williams +0.7 21
$ 0 LAC Ladd McConkey +0.3 22
$ 0 WAS Terry McLaurin +0.1 23
$ 0 BUF DJ Moore +0.0 24
$ 0 CHI Rome Odunze +0.0 25
$ -0 DEN Jaylen Waddle -0.1 26
$ -0 CHI Luther Burden III -0.1 27
$ -0 GB Christian Watson -0.4 28
$ -0 DEN Courtland Sutton -0.5 29
$ -0 IND Alec Pierce -0.6 30
$ -0 ARI Marvin Harrison Jr. -0.6 31
$ -0 SF Mike Evans -0.6 32
$ -0 PIT DK Metcalf -0.6 33
$ -0 JAC Parker Washington -1.2 34
$ -0 JAC Brian Thomas Jr. -1.3 35
$ -0 PIT Michael Pittman -1.4 36
$ -0 TEN Carnell Tate -1.6 37
$ -0 GB Jayden Reed -1.7 38
$ -0 ARI Michael Wilson -1.7 39
$ -0 LAC Quentin Johnston -1.8 40
$ -0 JAC Jakobi Meyers -1.8 41
$ -0 TB Chris Godwin -1.9 42
$ -0 MIN Jordan Addison -1.9 43
$ -0 KC Xavier Worthy -2.0 44
$ -0 TEN Wan'Dale Robinson -2.1 45
$ -0 GB Matthew Golden -2.1 46
$ -0 NE Romeo Doubs -2.3 47
$ -0 WAS Stefon Diggs -2.3 48
$ -0 SF De'Zhaun Stribling -2.5 49
$ -0 BUF Khalil Shakir -2.6 50
$ -0 CLE KC Concepcion -2.6 51
$ -0 IND Josh Downs -2.6 52
$ -0 SEA Rashid Shaheed -2.7 53

The PTS/WK (VORP) column shows you how many more points per week are expected from this player, relative to the best bench player at this position.

Auction draft:

The COST column scales the VORP value based on your league budget.
This means, for example, that if you see QB Mahomes at $90 and TE Pitts at $10, they should have the same fantasy value as QB Hurts at $10 and TE Kelce at $90.
The concept of this chart is to help you find the best value for your money. You should see the COST column as "never go about this price".
Your goal during the auction is to acquire as many players as you can for prices below this COST value. That means you're getting more points per dollar than the average. You should have a more robust roster, as well as money left for bench players.

Snake draft:

The VALUE column compares the player's VORP to the projected starters at his position. This tells you how important this player is relative to others at his position.
This means, for example, that QB Mahomes at +10 PTS/WK might seem to have the same value as TE Kelce at +10 PTS/WK, but there might be several QBs that are close to +10 PTS/WK, while there are no other TEs close to +10 PTS/WK. Kelce has a higher value overall, because no one else at that position is a good substitute.

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